I’m really annoyed by people who don’t take the bull by the horns and bust a move in life – mainly because I know that the world will not wait for them. There are talented, skilled, awesome people out there who will never be recognized because they’re unmotivated or simply don’t know how to hustle. Unless you’re connected, born rich, or a lucky genius (which most are not) you have to be assertive to get what you want.
I’m assertive by nature and it’s apparent in everything I do, even something as simple as crossing a street. One hot summer day I was waiting with about 30 people to cross a busy downtown Chicago street. The “Do Not Walk” sign was flashing; however, there were NO cars in sight as far as the eye could see. Everyone stayed in their place while they waited for the “Walk” sign to flash. It was strange that no one assessed the situation and chose the obvious – except me. Everyone looked at me like I was crazy when I decided to be a big girl, look both ways and cross the street all by myself – and ignore the sign which was misguiding me. It’s like, OK, the Walk sign doesn’t have a brain, it doesn’t know that there are NO cars, but YOU DO so bust a move already, people! I kept thinking: don’t they feel kind of silly waiting for a sign to tell them something they learned to do when they were in second grade? Life’s too short to wait for a sign. |
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truth•a•hol•ic (trüth´ë´hôl´ik) n. 1 The relentless pursuit of uncovering and exposing the hidden meaning and true intentions of others through rationalization and analysis. 2 Having or showing strong reasoning skills and applying them in a quest for truth. 3 A cleverly constructed blog site containing witty dissertations about the truth in which each blog is appropriately titled with a line from a song and accompanied by a cute illustration. 
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One time I was waiting for the train to head to downtown Chicago from the suburbs. It was a Saturday morning and there were like 100 people waiting on the east side of the tracks. I never really took this particular train line to go downtown so I asked a few people where they were going and they all were headed to the city. There was a teleprompted message at the station that the train would be on the west track today and I, knowing my direction and where we were at, knew everyone was on the east side ( the wrong side). I asked a few people after seeing the message if knew if they were on the right side (doubting myself momentarily) and they responded that “the train headed downtown always comes on this side”. I went with my gut after reading the teleprompter and sat by myself on the west side of the track. I was the only one. The train roared in and it was obvious as it approached that it was, indeed, on my side ( the west side ). Not only did I feel like I was ahead of the game but it also felt great watching 100 people scramble to get to my side. Like 25 of them made it. The other 75 or so missed the train! There have been many occasions throughout history where entire civilizations have been wrong. Go with your gut…And yes…. Bust a move!
Hey Dan
Ha! I love that. That is awesome. people will always follow what the majority does and go with what they are used to. If the train always comes on that side ( the side they’re on) why would it change? The guy who made the teleprompter sign message is the real one to blame, most people don’t have that keen of a sense of direction to know which side is east and west. The message should have said.. attention:the train going to Chicago will not be on the east track like it normally is, it will instead be on the west track, please make necessary changes.
O.K., I understand the bleating sheep, heard mentality, but, I’m not sure if it’s technically against the law. Like the now camera monitored traffic lights, we may find ourselves receiving citations in the mail for doing such a thing. So, how about a beef on passwords? I’ve had it up to here…with them.
Should have put in…”Come on Poindexter…”
Hey Charles
Yeah, I will scream if I get a ticket in the mail for crossing the street, a task a 5th grader does!
By the way, remember..you don’t need a password s to post on Truthaholic.Com!
Best,
S
OMG! Sherrie, you just crack me up!!! You have since the first day I met you…today is especially funny because of all the syncronicity! (Did I spell the correctly?) Anyway. I was just thinking about you while reading this:
http://derek.s3.amazonaws.com/DerekSivers.pdf
“The best things in life are free!” and this is great (free) stuff! You have to read it. It can be applied to acting or writing, as well as music…
I would also like you to know…I started a new blog last week! Please check it out and let me know what you think. I do value your oppinion!!!
Best,
Pam
http://myawakeningjournal.blogspot.com/
Hi Pam
Your so sweet. Are you taking acting classes this time around? You really progressed in that class, more than anyone else. I also thought that guy Kelly was really good too. I will check out the link. I am familiar w.Derek Sivers, he’s the owner of CD Baby which I have a link to on all of my sites!
:Shes got legs”…That be a song to consider Sherrie..
When I see the frozen masses myself at street corners they remind me of the bundled up pylons in the Chicago River, going nowhere fast..
Live your live with gusto, walk your talk!! Sherrie just add gusto and you’re right it is the ONLY way you’ll fly to where you want to be….
Right on Dr. Kevin
Back-at-cha.
We are on an Army field problem in South Dakota. The problem we are facing is significant if we wait for the “light to change.” We face no danger now if we act, we will face danger if we fail to act. Is it a really a problem if a solution is easily discovered. JA
Hey Jash
I hear ya. Most people only act when they are told or when there is serious and immediate consequences. There is much to be said for foresight.
Stay Safe
Sherrie
Bad example. At about the same age I learned the safe procedure to cross the street, I also learned the need to obey laws. Crossing the street against the advice of the blinking sign is illegal in many places. Are you suggesting we pick and choose which laws to obey? You do have a point in “bust a move”, but there are more enlightened examples available, … or is it the rush you feel when you go against what the others are doing?
Hi Scott
Well, I’m not an adrenaline junkie or a thrill seeker. I’m afraid of roller coaters and I don’t even like the steep turn on Lake Shore Drive!
I get no rush from performing a task I learned in 5th grade. I do get insulted that the world thinks we all need a sign to successfully do so.
As far as not obeying the law, let me put it this way, following a rule or a law should never supersede common sense. Like if there was a fire, and the only door to use said “do not enter” you’d enter it, and disobey the sign to save your life. Crossing the street is not as urgent as a fire, however I feel silly waiting 3 minutes for NO cars to pass, but that’s my personality. The traffic signs are just a guideline. The sign doesn’t know that it’s Memorial Day and half of the town is out of town, the sign doesn’t know it’s 2am and no one is driving on this street, the sign doesn’t know there is construction and the streets surrounding the one your on are all closed, the sign doesn’t know that traffic ebbs and flows and sometimes there are just no cars coming.
It’s just one way of looking at things- I’m not sure there is a penalty/against the law for not obeying a traffic sign for pedestrians.
you gotta remember,in this world
20 % of the people produce 80% of results,most of society is taught to be drones from a very early age,and others break away.
some are never taught as children to be “motivated”,and most importantly many just lack
judgemental common sense!
one more point is that it is that type of mentality and “hustle” that makes the leaders in this world,to which we know,not everone can be a leader
Hi Rich
Yes. I agree, of course. There are people replying to this blog who are talking about obeying the sign. Obeying? that word is for children and religions people, both of which I am not.
I just think it’s absurd to wait up to 3 minutes when your an adult and you have a brain and eyes that can clearly function well enough to tell you to cross a street..sign or no sign!
Hi,
Thank you for this as I know that at times I lack assertiveness
However, crossing the street when not supposed to is a BAD IDEA. A friend of mine saw someone get crushed by a large truck because they did this.
Just because we think the streets are clear does not always mean they are.
Hi Andre
That is good that you are trying to be more assertive!
So here is some advice toward your pursuit in being more assertive…assertive people don’t really care about what they are “supposed to do” they follow their gut and trust themselves…. way more than a blinking sign, for sure. Bottom line if there are no cars coming and its pretty plain to see that you won’t get killed, you should cross. Who are you going to trust more a sign that’s on a timer for 22 years or yourself? Signs can be wrong. They don’t factor in , traffic, holidays ( when 50% of the cars are not on the roads) or crazy truck drivers who run over people.
Your friend who saw someone get hit by a truck well, maybe that person who got hit was crazy or may not have had good judgment. Big trucks are pretty hard to miss.
I assure you Andre ..if you look both ways, and trust yourself you won’t get hit by a big truck.
Ha! That’s great, Sherrie! Would you be my manager? I just fired mine and need someone like you onboard!
I’m in. Where do I sign?
S
I understand and mostly agree with the concept of your post, but your example is a poor one. People who don’t blatantly break the law are not necessarily sheeple. I would be one of the people that waited at the light. People who know me would definitely not describe me as not being assertive…including you. LOL.
Mel
Hey Beavis
Well, trust yourself and do what you would do if there was no sign there at all. Being so assertive, do you feel silly waiting for a sign to tell you to do something you learned in 5th grade?
Would you feel comfortable waiting for a person to tell you when to cross the street? Why is an automated sign more acceptable?
If you’re one of the people waiting for the sign to change, when there are clearly no cars coming, maybe your not as assertive as you used to be or as you think you are. I am just supposing, not suggesting. There are levels of everything.
I have to agree with you on this even though it’s probably against the law. Why wait if there is clearly no danger what so ever. I live fairly close to a train track and every once in awhile the train will stop fairly close to the guard crossing but the guard crossing will stay down with all the bells and whistles blowing. When this happens I will always get out of my car and go up to see if there is even a train there, if it is thereand it is stopped or if it is not there i will run back to my car and go around the other cars waiting and go through the railings. It is very clear that there is n danger and no one is going to get hurt so I go with it. Some tell me that I should never do this but i always say that there obviously is something wrong with the railroad car or the bells would be down with no train in sight or being stopped all together.
Hey Kip
I agree with you. Check things out, see it for yourself. Signs aren’t always right. I would do the same thing too, especially if it is in my neighborhood and it happens often.
It’s like when you’re in line at a public bathroom (guys probably not so much) your thinking all of the stalls are taken so you just wait in line. I NEVER trust this! I always go and check every stall and sure enough about 30% of the time there is one that is vacant that no one in line knew about. Don’t be so quick to follow…see it for yourself!
S
hmmm. That is a tricky one. I am a rule follower by nature, so I would have been one of the dorks to wait for the walk sign before walking….however, I have almost had my ass run over several times in San Francisco walking in a crosswalk, when the walk sign was flashing by those A-Holes who make a right turn and don’t stop at the corner and wait for you to cross. I will have to think about this more….BTW although I am a rule follower, I have taken the initiative to start two companies…so I take myself off of the “do not bust a move” list….
Also BTW I am one of those people who gets mad at my g/friend when we are at Safeway and she decides she doesn’t want the box of “cheez its” and puts the box away on any random shelf near by, where it clearly does not belong…I have been known to take the box down, and walk it all the way back to the snack food isle…..I have just now realized while writing this that I clearly have issues…..
Hey Keep it real,
Yeah San Fran is sooo different, if it is a straight street with no hills, or curves then your eyes and your brain are a better indication than a sign. The sign is just a guideline and not in line with the changing reality of life, traffic and people. Following the rules should never supersede common sense. I view crossing the street as a task that I can handle and don’t need help with anymore. If I was in San Fran I’d be much more observant and heed to the signs, especially because it is not familiar to me
I don’t even look at the signs anymore, here in Chicago. Hey maybe it’s just a Chicago thing. I don’t even notice that I’m not supposed to be walking till I’m already on the other side closer to the do not walk sign.
Yeah I always return the shopping carts. I never leave them in the middle of the parking lot. Rude! I have my little pet peeves with shopping too. Lol
Why so combative? I just don’t see how waiting for the sign dictates that a person lacks assertiveness or means that they have not evolved past the 5th grade level. What ever happened to live and let live? If you choose to disregard the law – have at it. Why judge others (and their personality) based on something so trivial?
Hi Katie
I don’t think I’m being combative at all in my blog. If you have time please read it again and point out the combative lines to me, that is not how I meant to come across and I’m sorry if I did. I never said they didn’t evolve past 5th grade, I ask the question to everyone– if they ever feel silly waiting to be instructed to do something they learned in the 5th grade? There is a big difference between asking and accusing. If that questions offends perhaps it’s because it’s poignant and tugs at the part of them that does yearn to be assertive, free, open, outside the box, whatever…
I think it is ridiculous to wait for a person or a sign to tell you that it’s ok to cross a street. A pretty simple task learned in the 5th grade. It seems a bit off, when there are clearly NO cars coming and 30 adults with jobs, families, mortgages..etc wait for an automated sign to give them permission to cross the street. It’s humorous. Isn’t it?
I do view that way of thinking as an indication that the person is not very assertive if they choose to follow a sign rather than assess the situation time by time and trust their judgment, especially because the task IS so trivial. That is my point exactly, as you brilliantly pointed out already.
There are levels of everything, what I view as not very assertive may be very assertive to others. It is just an observation and a way to get people to think about things and reassess themselves or others. Which is what my blogs are all about.
I think we are all capable of using our common sense to cross a street. That’s all. Signs and laws should never supersede common sense- that’s all this blog is really about.
One last thing, I will definately intrude on the ladies bathroom if there is a huge line for the guys and no ladies in sight. They all flush the same!!!!!
oh my god me too Kip! I use the mens room all the time! even if there is a guy peeing ..I’m like.. hey…and I walk in and use the stall. Guys never tell on me, and my bladder is happy.
S
Young MC, the artists, sorry S had to google that one
Dr K
Thanks for the props Sherri.
And a shout out to TRUTHAHOLIC.
I DON’T know how you found me, or why I was blessed by being asked to join your blog. BUT I HEART YOU and AM SO FREAKIN happy to get your opinions sent to me every month. And always happy to give my 2 cents back to your Truthaholic society.
YOU ROCK GIRL!!!
Sherri, Yes….San Francisco is a society of its own. Filled with rule followers and non rule followers!! Shopping cart violators and bike rider hitters (it was an accident, twice, I swear!!).
I just do my best to keep it real and be honest, and true. That doesn’t mean I am perfect and there have been one or two times when I have RUN across the street, not even in the crosswalk, cuz I was in a hurry!
I own two businesses damn it! I got places to be !!! 
BTW Katie. I have a song title for you….
“You Bring Me Down”
-blood red shoes, box of secrets- U.K.
he he he …..
just “keepin it real”
Hey Keep It Real..
Are you a guy? It just occured to me that I’m ASSUMING you are, ya know, on account that you’re cool and I like you and when you disagree with something you’re not all crazy!
Sherrie
your right on the money it is
about accessing a situation,and as an itelligent human being
making a decision if you are dumb enough to walk in front of a speeding truck your dumb enough to get hit,dont follow around like lemming move about this world,take a chance here
and there and be different,lead follow or get out of the way!i take chances every day crossing a busy street – and i wouldnt have it any other way
So how come 75% of my posters are guys? When girls DO post they are not liking my blogs/me and are being pretty mean and name calling in many cases, except Pam, she’s the only girl that likes me…lol
What’s up with that?
Any comments from the guys?
S
as a firefighter/paramedic I have picked up pieces of people who went past the flashing train gates because they looked and no train was comming. Traffic control lights take into account turning lanes for traffic flow so even if your street is clear what what about the car in the turning lane of the cross street? By following the crossing light you practice a good habit by ignoring it now you may be careless in the future when there is a vehicle comming. Whats the big deal about waiting for 20 seconds? What kind of example is being shown here? What if there was a young child who does not have your wonderful acute sense of reasoning and ignores the cross light when it is not safe? Are you that insecure that you need to be “assertive” by not waiting for a few seconds for a traffic light, I think it takes more than that.
Hi Dave
I’m not trying to prove something by crossing a street. I don’t think it is brave or a big accomplishment for an adult to decide if it’s safe to cross a street. That is the whole premise of my blog, the fact that it’s not a big deal yet is hardly ever done, yet requires little skill is why it’s humorous to me.
I am in agreement with you Dave, children should adhere to the sign always.They do not have the life experience, confidence, or the “careful mentality” to make judgments against signage and laws. I was referring to adults, though I am not clear about that in my blog (my fault.)
I think I’m clear about the fact that I am referring to being assertive when there are clearly NO cars for MILES. I’m not referring to not a 2 second break in traffic and making a run for it. That’s just risky and I am not a risk taker when it comes to my life or others lives.
Being a firefighter I’m sure you see people dying senselessly by making careless decisions. I do not classify accessing a situation rather than mindlessly following a sign and crossing a street that is clearly vacant of cars careless. It takes more thought and awareness to assess a situation then to blindly follow a sign with no care to your surroundings. I’m sure many have died following the rules, trusting everyone else would too, which is a form of being careless.
So Dave, I think there are people who are capable of being independent thinkers who are safe/careful at the same time. I think that is a possible trait that you’re overlooking because you’ve seen so much tragedy, I can’t say I’d feel differently if I were you. You are assuming I’m careless because I choose to look around and assess situations and base my decision on my observations, rather than ONLY on the signage. I’m still looking around and being safe while I’m assessing and deciding and acting.That’s the difference between reckless behavior and mindful and thoughtful behavior. I’m the girl that looks under the cars parked next to mine in parking lots and is freaked if there is a van parked next to my car, for fear that bad guys will open a huge van door and kidnap me.
I’m just saying assess the situation always no matter what, it doesn’t take a genius or a keen sense of anything to know if you are in danger. Look at the signs, look around you and be your own person who is aware. If you ONLY rely on signs and laws to protect you, you’ll certainly be opening yourself up to danger.
Be Safe
Sherrie
My job security is cemented by people making careless or bad decisions daily. People can create a habit by repeating a task as little as three times. What I am assuming, is by making a habit of not following the sign people leave themselves open to becomming careless in their assessment of this action as it becomes a habit or discriminatory reflex.(An act we do so often we do it from a sub-concious part of the brain. An example is driving home from work which you do daily and this day not remembering doing it when you get home). It is so easy to be distracted with all that goes on around us that by making crossing against the light a habit, you run the risk of changing this assessment of the ability to cross against the light, to a reflex reaction which can and often does, lead to a mistake. The signs are there to take the thinking out of this basic action…. no need to think about when to cross wait till the sign tells you it’s ok.This way people will be safe from themselves. I did not mean to imply that you are insecure, what I ment was that this is such a small issue that it would be better served to be assertive over issues and actions with a higher purpose like the war in Iraq, the price of oil, or Grant park green space…and believe me a bump from a car is a lot different that the splat from the express train you didn’t see comming at 60mph on the center track when there were 2 other trains stopped on the two outside sets of tracks, so don’t apply this to train crossings no matter how careful you are….. D
I have a good friend who has always worked in the medical field. One job he had was working with terminally ill people. Besides tending to their medical needs, he spent personal time just talking with them–becoming very close to them–befriending them if only to help them realize they weren’t alone. Many patients opened up to him in conversations that were, in many cases, deeply honest and sincere. In a great number of these conversations, the question was asked to the patient, “If you had to live your life over again, would you do anything different?”. The majority of the patients answered similarly “Yes. I would have taken more chances.”